Plights of Bored Decepticons
by Jeysie
Summary: Snapdragon finds out the hard way that being a late riser around Decepticons with too much time on their hands is never a good idea. Sunbowverse/Headmaster continuity.


_Opening Note: My entry for the April edition of a monthly fan-run short story contest on IDW Publishing's forums. The character prompt was for Snapdragon._

* * *

Scrapper stepped back to appraise their new "wall hanging". Granted, flowers and polka-dots weren't his preferred style - and his "artists" were decidedly lacking in skill - but, nevertheless, it was an effective shrine to humiliation. "Looks like we're almost finished. All we need is his reaction to cap it off."

"Actually... let him keep recharging. I'll take bets on how long it'll take him to wake up, if someone'll keep watch. It could be a while." Swindle grinned and prepared to take notes. The others shrugged and voiced general assent to the idea, while Rumble indicated himself and Frenzy.

"We'll do it! I wanna see the look on his face!"

"He doesn't _have_ a face right now, idiot."

"Figger-tively speakin'..."

* * *

"Do you have... a two?"

"Go fish."

Rrrrrrrpuhpuhpuhpuh.

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

Rrrrrrrpuhpuhpuhpuh.

"**That**. ...I think he's actually snoring."

"You know, I think you're right. But, how? He doesn't have a real head right now, and we don't breathe..."

"I know, but it sure _sounds_ like snoring, don't it?"

Rrrrrrrpuhpuhpuhpuh...

* * *

Rumble had just mentally connected the polka-dots on Snapdragon's body to resemble Blaster's head melting, when suddenly he noticed movement above. He stared, then glanced over to find Frenzy looking back at him with a matching shocked expression, and reactivated his audios.

RRRRRRRPUHPUHPUHPUH.

He sighed, then, "Did you see that?"

"See the head contraption wink at us?"

"Yeah."

"...nah, didn't see it."

"Not funny." Rumble cuffed his twin, then looked back at the "head" they'd put in place of Krunk. It wasn't moving right _now_, aside from jiggles whenever Snapdragon twitched, but...

"_Did_ it really move?"

"Dunno... but let's turn it around anyway. Scrapper outdid himself in the freaky department whether it's movin' or not."

"...OK."

* * *

Scrapper finally finished the "repair" by refastening Snapdragon's last dangling limb to the wall, then glared at the cassettes. "Don't touch him again."

"It was freaky!"

"Touch him, and I'll weld you into the sculpture."

"Fine, whatever. It's bad enough he fell on me. Ow."

Misfire stared as Snapdragon continued recharging blissfully, and dejectedly dropped his losing bet into Swindle's outstretched hand. "I can't believe he stayed offline through this."

RRRRRRRPUHPUHPUHPUH.

"What... **is** that?"

"It's a long story..."

* * *

"Guys, get in here. He's awake."

"Hahahaha! Lookit 'im squirm!"

* * *

"GGGGGRRRRRRAAAARRRRR! Wait 'til I get my claws on all of you..."

The pranksters watched his reactions with expressions somewhere between amusement and worry - except for Scrapper, who looked between surprised and happy. "It's a success!"

"...then I'll rip your limbs off and **beat** you with them. And you! You helped!" Snapdragon banged his head against the wall, eliciting a dismayed noise from within.

"I'm sure you'd like to, provided you get down before you're shot for not showing up at battle." Swindle finally grinned. "Good luck with that."

"But... it's not my fault! I... I _can't_ move, can I?"

"Not if you're properly attached this time." Scrapper glared at the still-unapologetic cassettes.

"So, I _can't_ go to battle, and nobody can say anything."

"Well..." Swindle considered this, "I suppose they can't..."

"...works for me." Snapdragon banged his head again, provoking more noise, then... -click-

All was silent as many pairs of optics stared in disbelief, then Scrapper muttered, "I take it back. Not a success after all."

Krunk staggered dizzily as he transformed. "Urgh... well... at least I won the bet. Hand it over."

"Now, wait a minute. I'm not sure this counts. He went right back to recharging..."

"Don't start with me..." Krunk gestured unsteadily in a direction that was not remotely near Swindle's actual position.

Meanwhile...

RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPUHPUHPUHPUHPUHPUHPUHPUH.

"...not again..."


End file.
